Its a New Year

I've been busy! The end of the year was hectic... as it usually is, but ended in a nice note.

November recap:

Incredibly busy at work. Unfortunate events caused me and my fellow team members to be overworked and under the pressure working ridiculous hours and stressed. Highlight!? I booked a last minute flight out to see the M (previously known here as the BF) to spend turkey day and his birthday with him. Being able to work remotely at a pinch has its perks.
Random... I caught a lobster while fishing on the Ocean Beach Pier (really, that's the name).


December recap:

More unfortunate events at work cause an already stressful situation into a war zone. So as you can imagine ... end of year holidays couldn't come soon enough. I used the rest of my vacation visiting my folks in FL. M came down for x-mas week and I stayed on through New Years. Overall, it was super fun and I took the time to decompress.
Random... M and I went jetskiing in the St Pete bay and made some dolphin friends! I have no picture proof though :(

Which leads me to January. Back to the cold and stressful north east, dealing with terrible -15 degree wind chill weather, days of cancelled flights, turbulent air travel, burst water pipes at home, super slippery ice everywhere, and lack of sun light. But it just seems that I always end up balancing the extra crappy bad with the super special good. I'm okay with that... it just means something especially nice should happen soon.

Cross Continent Road Trip!

Fun times to be had!

Just flew back from a roadtrip helping the BF move across the continent to sunny and beautiful SoCal. It was really fun but surprisingly stressful. Between worrying the car was going to explode hauling his prized possession and making sure we would get to our destination in time for my flight, we definitely had some tense moments sitting next to one another. We could have made better preparations, but being cheap and easy is usually our modus operandi.


I love road trips. There is something about being out in the road looking at the changing landscapes and finding random local eccentricities that I truly enjoy.

Highlight for me was the food from each region. Sampled various Philly Cheesestakes, An all American Diner in St. Louis, BBQ from Texas, Fish tacos from SoCal.

We also collected specialty brew beers from each state we stopped at getting to sample them when we finally made it to our destination in celebration of a mission success.

Amid fart jokes and being silly and romantic we had heart wrenching conversations about when we would see each other again and what we have planned for our future. Followed by bouts of silence. Silences I find reflective and he frustrating.

This ordeal has shown me, despite our differences we are definitely good for each other. And I know I'm really going to miss him.

Long distance

Boyfriend is officially moving across the country. I will be helping him do his relocation late next week. We will be doing a road trip from the cold and rainy east coast cutting diagonally all the way to the sunny and dry west coast. It has all escalated pretty quickly, between getting the call, accepting the job offer and now in the middle of two week notice to his current employer.

Future plan is for me to also find a job out in the west coast, but who knows how long we will be doing the long distance thing. I've been in this situation before, and I know it is difficult. My last relationship was also a long distance... and obviously that did not work.

I am super happy for him though! It sounds like exactly what he wanted and he has been looking for a different opportunity when it just dropped like a rock from the sky and landed on his lap. Es un reventado! As my family would say. He laughs that he is just really lucky to have this opportunity but really he is skilled and he deserves this.

Kid at heart

Do you consider yourself a grown-up?

My friend asked me this when we were out biking this weekend. Probably my last bike ride of the fall. It was beautiful out, the breeze was full of wilting brown leaves whipping past my hair and crunching under the tires. I turned to him and said "No! ... well maybe" and felt a little bit of myself get crushed too.

When I was 10 years old I would say, everyone over 18 is definitely a grown-up. At 18 I would say, no way, I'm going to school still, I'm a kid. At 25, do I have an excuse?

Finished school a couple of years ago (23)... so that's not a reason anymore. Left home, got a job, pay bills, own a car, do my own laundry, make dinner for myself. Yeah, I still call mami and papi on the phone, but I'm mostly autonomous. I actually take a lot of pride in that. I like that I am independent. That all definitely sounds really grown like...

It's interesting to take a survey of your life two years after the fact and check it off as the day you "grew up". Sure I would rather spend the day in sweats and play videogames but I get dressed and go off to work instead. How mundane. Silly grown person making money to pay for food and shelter.

What's next? Evolve to ultra grown-up with loans and mortgages and little people to take care of?

My response to him should have been. "Labels are silly, they just make you evaluate your life on something that has no tangible meaning." But I didn't, and I fell into the trap anyway. I mean, we were hanging out, riding our bikes along the lake on a Sunday afternoon. I should put tassels on my bike.

One day at a time, one day at a time. >_<

Bucket List

Lately I've been fascinated with the idea of a bucket list. I think it is an interesting method of getting to know a person by learning what it is they aspire to in life. Being at this juncture of my timeline, and after seeing a quarter of a century of winters, it is time to write down some goals. I say that because I think at my age I've experienced enough to know what I value as important and attainable for my future, but I'm also young enough to reminisce on my childhood dreams. This is my first attempt at making a "bucket list" and I'm sure its something I'm going to expand on and continuously come back to... but its a start.

My Bucket List

1. Have enough money to do all the things on this list and retire!
2. Travel everywhere...
   
   • Road trip to Yellowstone
   • See the Aurora Borealis
   • Find monkeys in the Costa Rican Rainforest 
   • Visit the Great Wall of China
   • See the Great Pyramids of Giza
   • Hike Machu Picchu 
   • Go to a Polynesian Island with an active volcano
   • Ride an elephant in Thailand
   • Go on Safari in Africa
   • etc.
3. Learn a new language and be fluent (Italian, French, Japanese...)
4. Be better at keeping connections with friends and family
5. Own a Home
6. Find the love of my life 
7. Get married to the love of my life
8. Have children and be a good mother
9. Run my own business, or work doing something I have a passion for
10. Attain and maintain my ideal weight 
11. Learn to do an extreme sport well (snowboarding, surfing, skydiving, scuba)
12. Always be surrounded by music, playing guitar or singing
13. Ride/build/own a helicopter or hovercraft
14. Set aside time for artistic hobbies that are mediums for creation (painting, sewing, coding)
15. Grow my own food be it flora or fauna (Hydroponics!)
16. Cook delicious meals and become a skilled home cook
17. Never stop learning
18. Be better at recording the special memories
19. Take time to meditate and practice yoga
20. Find what I love to do and do it often with people I love!

I'll be gentle for our first time

Hi!

I'm starting this blog because I figured I should start logging the events of my life. I've consistently failed in doing this in the past. Blame it on lack of motivation or interest in my part. There are many things developing in my life at the moment, so what better time to record than now!

The good:
There is a new and wonderful man in my life. We have been together for about a month now. It certainly looks and feels and taste like love. LOVE. Its fun and scary both in ways that make my heart beats fast. Its also gentle and comforting knowing he feels the same way. I don't really believe in true love. Just chemical pheromones, with this incredible combination of attraction and affection. This is the deepest I have ever felt and I'm in awe that we have found it. People are flawed, people are broken. I just happened to have found someone whose broken flawed pieces compliment mine.

The bad:
Things are coming to a head at work. Unfortunately it has been tumbling downhill for some time now. Frustrating and demoralizing, the future is bleak. I have decided to jump ship on my own accord before either the whole ship goes under or someone else decides to push me. Right now, I'm in the process of blowing up different safety rafts. One way or another its going to be big shift in my life and a big step towards my very uncertain future.

While I'm an independent creature that feeds on the opportunity of change, it can be quite daunting sometimes. Like scaling a cliff, I like having to figure out how to continually climb higher and higher, but once at the precipice I notice its just a ledge and I have to either keep climbing or jump. Always without a harness.

The ugly:
Mix a little bit of the bad and a chock-full of good. Complicated mess? Wonderful opportunity? We are both talking about the next big career move that will happen in 6 months, 1 year, who knows. It is great that we are openly talking about the future, but is it nuts to be talking about moving somewhere together?? Yes. Insane. I've been committed. (@_@)